Being trapped.
Literally, figuratively- it's all the same to me. The literal meaning of trapped is most terrifying, insinuating some form of binding and the inability to escape. And yet, to feel this in a less literal way, is a painful feeling. I've had plenty of jobs, in which I've felt trapped, begging and looking at the horizon for any opportunity which might present, to me, some means of escape.
Being trapped, though, in a relationship, is by far the most dreaded, at least to me, that is.
To be stuck in an unhappy marriage or relationship would be my downfall. To engage in a relationship, in which I completely lost my sense of self, my goals, my passion and some sense of excitement would break me, I'm afraid.
The fact that I have never married, and never had children relieves me, at times, to no end. There's freedom in that. The universe could have bestowed upon me the perfect man at an early age, true. And life could have been a field of lavender in summer time, but that's not how it worked out for me.
Instead, the universe gave me the gumption to maintain my sense of self and see, openly, when a situation presented itself...sometimes it took me a while to get to a state of recognition, yet ultimately, I can say that I am confident in my choices, up to the point and take some pride in the fact that there was no option, to "take the simple or easy route," in life.
Taking life in stride, amidst the chaos, is something I could certainly work on, but the concept of staying true to myself is a pretty solid one, in my mind...the idea of marrying for anything other than love is unacceptable to me and something I could never bring myself to do. Marrying for security and out of desperation might be....
timer goes off...
Literally, figuratively- it's all the same to me. The literal meaning of trapped is most terrifying, insinuating some form of binding and the inability to escape. And yet, to feel this in a less literal way, is a painful feeling. I've had plenty of jobs, in which I've felt trapped, begging and looking at the horizon for any opportunity which might present, to me, some means of escape.
Being trapped, though, in a relationship, is by far the most dreaded, at least to me, that is.
To be stuck in an unhappy marriage or relationship would be my downfall. To engage in a relationship, in which I completely lost my sense of self, my goals, my passion and some sense of excitement would break me, I'm afraid.
The fact that I have never married, and never had children relieves me, at times, to no end. There's freedom in that. The universe could have bestowed upon me the perfect man at an early age, true. And life could have been a field of lavender in summer time, but that's not how it worked out for me.
Instead, the universe gave me the gumption to maintain my sense of self and see, openly, when a situation presented itself...sometimes it took me a while to get to a state of recognition, yet ultimately, I can say that I am confident in my choices, up to the point and take some pride in the fact that there was no option, to "take the simple or easy route," in life.
Taking life in stride, amidst the chaos, is something I could certainly work on, but the concept of staying true to myself is a pretty solid one, in my mind...the idea of marrying for anything other than love is unacceptable to me and something I could never bring myself to do. Marrying for security and out of desperation might be....
timer goes off...
